


Beetlejuice and The Demon Who Can't Read

by Hami_Hufflepuff



Series: Beetlejuice One Shots [2]
Category: Beetlejuice - All Media Types
Genre: Barbara and Adam are highkey nerds and they love Harry Potter, Beetlejuice cannot read, Beetlejuice lowkey doesn't like getting a lot of help, F/M, He also can't write, M/M, Multi, OOC, Quite a bit of angst, The movie kind of inspired the Maitlands personalities, This takes place after the previous fic, especially for things he thinks he should know, there is still a lot of fluff, this was based on a tumblr prompt
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-24
Updated: 2019-10-24
Packaged: 2021-01-02 05:37:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,355
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21156488
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Hami_Hufflepuff/pseuds/Hami_Hufflepuff
Summary: Beetlejuice finds Adam and Barbara reading Harry Potter in the attic, Beetlejuice remembers he can’t read, angst and stuff ensues.





	Beetlejuice and The Demon Who Can't Read

**Author's Note:**

> Pretty angsty, there are warnings for where the angst is. I don't know what to say tbh. I guess it was fun to write.

It was a dark and stormy night; the trees trembled, and thunder roared. For the Maitland's and the Deetz', it was a rather peaceful night, Charles and Delia were asleep, Lydia was on her laptop writing away, the Maitlands were reading, and Beetlejuice was watching a boring horror movie. It was Frankenstein if you were curious. Beetlejuice got bored of the film immediately and decided to prank Barbara and Adam, his significant others. He floated up the stairs and into the attic without bothering to knock.

Beetlejuice was about to transform into the most terrifying creature known to humankind and screech, but the Maitlands caught him. "Beetlejuice, I love you, dearly, but it's one in the morning. I do not want to hear you screeching right now." Adam murmured. Barbara shrugged tiredly in agreement.

"Oh, so Lydia gets to do that, but I can't?" Beetlejuice grumbled to himself. "Anyway, what are you nerds reading?" He glanced at the "Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban" book in Adam's hands.

Adam decided to ignore what Beetlejuice first said until the morning. Anyway, he was confused but answered as casually as he could, "I'm reading Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban. It's one of my favorite books in the series. Well, after Sorcerer's Stone, that is."

"A-dog, what the heck is Harry Potter?" Beetlejuice asked, summoning an unsweetened iced tea.

Adam dramatically gasped, putting a hand on his chest. "How do you not know what Harry Potter is? How do you not know what one of the most successful book series is?!" He asked in bewilderment, and he set his book and glasses down. "Barbara, can you please help me out here?" Barbara had looked up at this point, sharing the same look that Adam had. 

"Bug, he is right. How on Earth, Heaven, Hell, and the Netherworld do you not know what Harry Potter is?" Barbara got up, went to the bookshelf in the corner, and grabbed "Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone." Adam was grumbling about how it's technically "Harry Potter and the Philosopher's Stone" which Beetlejuice was confused by, Barbara walked over to them and started reciting "Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone."

"Babs, you didn't even open the book? Wait, did you memorize it?!" Beetlejuice was surprised, concerned, and impressed at the same time. 

"Yeah, I did. I don't mean to brag, but I've read the whole series at least ten times, this is my eleventh time reading it. "Barbara shrugged nonchalantly while Adam smiled brightly, clearly impressed by his wife. 

"Holy crap, that's hot, nerdy, and impressive. I think I'd rather read the book though, no offense babe, but I don't want to miss a single detail," truth be told, Beetlejuice hadn't read anything in a couple hundred years. That didn't mean he didn't want to try. Barbara was a little hurt but gave the book to Beetlejuice. Beetlejuice tried reading it, keyword "tried," but he couldn't get past the first sentence. After about an hour, he put the book down and mumbled something about how it was really boring. 

The Maitlands noticed how Beetlejuice was struggling to read the first sentence, so they suspected that he didn't know or remember how to read. Barbara spoke up, "Beetlejuice, I hope that I don't upset you by saying this, but do you know how to read?"

Beetlejuice was taken aback by that and stuttered out a reply, "of c-course I do. How-how co-could I n-not know how to re-read?"

"You couldn't read the first sentence. How long has it been since you've read something?" Adam asked, and Beetlejuice mumbled something along the lines of "a couple hundred years ago." 

When asked to clarify, Beetlejuice yelled as quietly as he could without waking anybody up, "a couple hundred years ago. It was the Reynolds' Pamphlet if you were curious."

Barbara and Adam made a face of disgust. "Why am I not surprised?" Barbara mumbled, "and that's a long time to go without reading. Do you want some help with reading?"

"Nope! I'm fine! I am absolutely fine! One hundred percent okay!" Beetlejuice blurted, "I'll just be on the roof, trying to read this stupid book!" He took the book, held it up in the air, and teleported to the roof.

"Barbara, should we go after him?" Adam hesitantly asked after a moment of silence.

"No, we should let him have his space. We can check on him in about an hour or so. In the meantime, do you wanna pick out a movie? I can look up some resources to teach Beetlejuice how to read." Barbara smiled, walked over to where Adam was sitting, and placed a kiss on his cheek.

"Alright, honey, I'll also get some of my old books out just to see if Lovebug is interested in them." Adam smiled up at his wife and placed a kiss on her lips. Barbara returned the kiss for a little bit before going onto the computer to look up ways to teach someone how to read.

Adam picked out Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone for their movie; if Beetlejuice never relearns to read, then at least he can watch the movie.  
\--------------------------------------------------------------------  
Beetlejuice threw the book on the roof and tried to wipe his tears away. His hair was a combination of red, blue, and purple, he covered his face with his hands as tears streamed down his face. "WHY CAN'T I DO ANYTHING RIGHT?!" Beetlejuice screamed into his hands. For once in his life or after-life, he was glad that nobody outside the house could see him.

He sobbed loudly and brought his legs up to his body, he summoned a pair of arms and wrapped them around his legs. He wanted to throw the dang book off of the roof, but he didn't want to make Adam and Barbara mad at him, so he barely refrained from doing it. He shuddered and summoned a blanket since it was getting a little cold out. Once the tears slowed down a little, he took his iPod and headphones out from his jacket pocket and started to play some rap music, it always helped calm him down.

He looked down at the ground, smiling softly. He chuckled and held himself. He started to get lost in his thoughts when the Maitlands came up to the roof to check on him. He quickly unsummoned the extra limbs and stood up as casually as he could. "Hey, Beetlejuice, are you okay?" Adam asked, moving closer to Beetlejuice.

"Yeah, I'm alright, Love. Just sucks that I can't read for the death of me." Beetlejuice chuckled and walked towards Adam and Barbara, wanting them to give him a hug, but he didn't want to appear too needy. Luckily for him, Barbara gave him a hug, which he just melted into. Adam joined the hug and gave Beetlejuice a kiss on the cheek that made Beetlejuice feel even more loved, and he returned the hug that the two gave him. 

"Sweetheart, it's okay. It's been a few hundred years, and you weren't really told to read some books. We would like to teach you to make things easier for you." Barbara whispered, combing her fingers through Beetlejuice's hair. 

"If you never figure it out, then that's okay. We just want you to be happy. We're just saying that there are more resources than ever to help you." Adam added, holding on to Beetlejuice.

Beetlejuice gave Barbara and Adam each a kiss on the cheek, "thank you, guys. I don't know how I could ever repay you."

"Well, I have an idea. You could watch the first Harry Potter movie with us!" Adam suggested happily.

Beetlejuice jokingly groaned, "oh, alright! Let's watch your nerdy movie." Barbara chuckled as Adam started talking about Harry Potter. Barbara led Beetlejuice into the attic and turned on the movie. Beetlejuice instantly became addicted to the series, and the three of them binge-watched the Harry Potter series. Beetlejuice theorized what house he was in and got into debates with Adam throughout the day. 

Beetlejuice guessed that it wasn't such a bad day after all.


End file.
